Adopted

I am a travesty

I wish I knew my ancestry

but i don’t because my own kin disowned me

#

I am racist towards my skin

ashamed of my people’s sins

i doubt we found amnesty

#

no, my face isn’t alchemy

I don’t think I

shapeshift into another ethnicity

yet some claim i am white

while some claim i am brown

i doubt i will ever be found

by anybody

#

i used to cut my flesh deep

so that i could escape the colour of my skin

or divide myself

like the adopted halfbreed I am

#

I don’t want to be a chameleon

I just want to be a solid person

#

i wish i could love all of me

but i don’t want to be this white girl

i don’t like this white world

But I’m not sure I feel comfortable with any of me

#

just feed me to the vultures

just a mutt who delves in all cultures

and never belongs

#

i just want to be a solid person

trying to find answers

but instead the pain worsens

i just want a family to belong to

I don’t want to trespass on a culture that can never be mine

#

i don’t belong anywhere

but my heart shows me how

all i have is who I have become to be

and i know who i am spiritually

they will never take me seriously

i will never have factual proof of my ancestry

they will never want me

disgraced and rejected

but I am still me

#

I don’t need history

to create the life that’s in front of me

#

I don’t need them to tell me who they think I am

I don’t need biological family to save me

#

I am a mystery

but I know who I am

that truth waits within me

I don’t need race to define me

my ancestry doesnt have to be my identity

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Published by

S.D.G

I love playing badminton above all else. I also really love water - swimming, soaking in a hottub, spending hours in a steam room or doing polar bear swims. I used to be really into wilderness survival & kayaking, but now I enjoy the finer things in life, like relaxation, comforts, spas, riches and anything pleasant. Poetry and song writing is just how I express myself and cope with life. I have a history of mental illness, eating disorders and addiction, plus I was a cancer survivor. Spirituality and healthy living is really important in my life. My art and novel writing is something I enjoy sometimes but not all times. Some people tell me I should sell it but it's just a hobby. You are more than welcome to support me if you like: paypal.me/sdgeiger

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